This is my personal blog about weight loss and now the work that comes after keeping the weight off and setting goals to stay on the path of a healthy life style. I started my last journey at 400+ pounds, I started my current journey at 195 pounds, now almost 2 years later I weigh 243 pounds. I have been working towards making a bigger stronger me. I eat the right foods ( oh I slip, I just don’t get carried away) and I still maintain almost daily work outs of some sort. I am a new dad and my schedule falls apart randomly as any parent knows but I make an effort to keep on track. It’s not easy but I want to be there and be in good shape for my son as he grows so I have to stay the course.
With the efforts of putting on more muscle I have obviously gained weight. I have gained almost 50 pounds in the same time it took me to lose 205 pounds. Every pound gained is unsettling. About every 5, hell sometimes once a week, I ask someone if I look like I am gaining the wrong weight. I have a measuring tape and I keep close track of my measurements. My brain still lies to me and tells me I am gaining the wrong type of weight. I stand in the mirror and eyeball myself from the front and the sides, is my stomach more pronounced? Is it water weight, have I done enough cardio this week? Holy crap I have to stop eating whatever food I ate that isn’t normally in my diet plan, it made me look pudgy.
I was told once that I may never know what I look like due to having seen myself over weight for so long. Recently I almost had to be convinced to go to a church function due to my outlandish concerns about how my stomach looks. I know my church folks as one of the least judgmental groups of people I hang out with but I could scarcely get over my own warped views of how my body should look. I went, pictures were taken thankfully, you know how I looked? Like a dude swimming, nothing more nothing less. It is a huge struggle on some days but if the last five years have proved anything to me it’s that God made me a fighter and with his help I will make it to the other side of this.
I know I am not the only person out there going through this. I have friends of all types of different ages, races, sexes and weights that all deal with this struggle. We work together, assure each other and hold each other accountable if things are askew. It isn’t perfect but it sure helps.
Thank you for taking the time to read this and have a wonderful day, may God bless you in all you do.